Confessions of a Raving Lunatic

Cast and props:

Raving Lunatic

God [represented with a bulb and an Amaryllis]

Use the white cloth to whip it through the air every time the word breath or breathe are said to signify when to say "Whoosh!"

Whenever we hear the word "Breath" we all say WHOOSH!

[Raving Lunatic runs up the center aisle panting]

Raving Lunatic: You won't believe what happened to me!  God came upon me and brought me by his breath to the middle of a dry valley that was full of dusty old bones!  God led me around.  There were bones everywhere all dried up!

[The bulb and amaryllis pop out

 

God: Mortal!

 

Raving Lunatic: God spoke to me!

 

God: Mortal!  Can these bones live?

[Raving Lunatic looks to the Amaryllis and bulb]

Raving Lunatic: 'O Lord my God!  Only you know!'  I replied.

God: Speak to these bones and say to them: 'O dry bones, hear the word of the Lord.  God says to these bones: I will cause breath to enter you, and you shall live.  I will lay sinews on you, and will cause flesh to come upon you, and cover you with skin, and put breath in you, and you shall live; and you shall know that I am God!'

[during the following section we need slow quite non-rythmic druming/thumping/clapping, maybe the rainstick that picks up and gets faster and louder throughout so that Raving Lunatic has to shout above the noise]

Raving Lunatic: So I did as I was told and I spoke.  Suddenly there was a noise, a rattling and the bones came together, bone to its bone.  I looked and there were sinews on them and flesh had come upon them and skin had covered them; but there was no breath in them yet.

God: Speak to the breath, speak, mortal, and say to the breath, Thus says God: Come from the four winds, O Breath.  And breathe upon these slain, that they may live."

Raving Lunatic: So I did as I was told and I spoke. And the breath came into them and they lived and stood on their feet.  A great many of them!

[the noise stops abruptly]

God: Moral, these bones are the whole house of Israel.  They say to me, 'Our bones are dried up, and our hope is lost; we are cut off completely' therefore speak to them and say, 'Thus says your God: I am going to open your graves, and bring you up from your graves, O my people; and I will bring you back to the land of Israel.  And you shall know that I am the Lord, when I open your graves, and bring you up from your graves, O my people.  I will put my breath within you and you will live, and I will place you on your own soil; then you shall know that I am your God and have spoken and will act.

"I See" said Samuel

The Lord said to Samuel, "How long with you grieve over Saul?  He was a bad king.  Fill your jar with oil and set out to Jesse the Bethlemite, for I have provided a new king among his sons."

"I see," said Samuel.

"No you don't," said the Lord.

Samuel did what the Lord commanded and came to Bethlehem and he said to Jesse and his sons, "Sanctify yourselves and come with me to a feast!"  Samuel sanctified Jesse and his sons and they came to the feast.

When Samuel saw Jesse's oldest son, he saw that Eliab was tall and strong and he thought, "Surely this is the Lord's anointed!" Overjoyed to have found the new king,

"I see!" said Samuel.

"No you don't!" said the Lord.

"Do not look on his appearance or his height, because I have rejected him;  I do not see as you see;  you look at the outward appearance, but I look on the heart."

Then Jesse called Abinadab, his second son, forward and made him walk before Samuel.  Again, Samuel saw that Abinadab was tall and strong with a kingly stature.  Again, overjoyed to have found the new king,

"I see!" said Samuel.

"No you don't!" said the Lord.

God had not choses this son either.  So Jesse made his third son, Shammah walk before Samuel.  And again,

"I see!" said Samuel.

"No you don't!" said the Lord.

Jesse made all seven of his sons walk before Samuel and every one of them was tall and strong and had a kingly stature and each time, Samuel said, "I see!"  and the Lord said, "No you don't!"

"The Lord has chosen none of these," said Samuel to Jesse.  "Are all your sons here?"

Jesse replied, "The youngest, David, is tending the sheep."

So Samuel said, "You must send for him and bring him before me as well.  We will not eat until he comes."

So Jesse sent for David and brought him before Samuel.  Samuel looked him over and saw that he was indeed very young, he looked nothing like his brothers.  There was more boy than man about him and Samuel thought, this couldn't possibly be the chosen one.

Disappointed, Samuel said, "I see just a boy before me"

"No you don't!" said the Lord.

For indeed, David was the chosen of the Lord, "Rise and anoint him, for he is the one," Said the Lord.

So Samuel took his jar of oil and anointed David in the presence of his brothers; and the spirit of the Lord came mightily upon David from that day forward.

Grumble, Grumble, Grumble

The Israelites followed Moses into the wilderness and came to Rephidim, but there was no water there for the people to drink.  So the people started to complain:

Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

Moses said to them, "Stop your grumbling and complaining against God.  Don't your remember all the wondrous things  God has done for you?"

But the people just complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

Moses said to them, don't you remember when you were hungry?  Didn't God make manna fall from heaven so that you could eat your fill each day, and gather enough of the 6th day to eat on the 7th and still rest?

But the people just complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

Moses continued, "And when you were still hungry and tired of eating manna, didn't God send quail so that you could eat meat?"

But the people just complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

And when you left Egypt with Pharaoh's armies pursuing you, didn't God protect you with a pillar of fire and a pillar of smoke.  And did not the pillar of fire lead you at night and the pillar of smoke lead you in the day.  And did not God keep a pillar between you and the armies of Pharaoh to keep you safe?

But the people just complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

And do you not remember slavery in Egypt how Pharaoh made you work seven days a week without straw to build temples to foreign gods without rest?  Do you not remember that you are now free and that God brings you to a promised land, a land promised to your ancestors, Abraham and Sarah?  Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel?

But the people just complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

Do you not remember when Pharaoh's armies were behind you and you came to the sea, how God parted the sea so that you could cross over on dry land.  And then God closed the sea up over the armies of pharaoh and thus God conquered your enemies and brought you to freedom.

But the people just complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)

So finally, Moses prayed to God, fearing that the Israelites were ready to stone him in their frustration.  God gave Moses instructions.  Moses took the leaders of the Israelites into the wilderness to a dry place, raised his staff, the same one he held over the sea, and struck a rock.  Water sprang forth in the desert and satisfied the people's thirst.

And Moses called that place Massah and Meribah because the people complained,
Grumble, grumble, grumble! (x3)